Morning Pages

monday morning here.

for you too unless you are reading this on another day or have time travelled to another time.

oh by the way...this is my attempt at The Artist Way...morning pages...i call it stream of consciousness. morning is one of those special creative times presumably...to let it all hang out.

back to time travel. i have no desire. not in my own life anyhow. what would be the point really. no desire to become twenty again or even thirty. there were bad times there too. i do want the world to stop at times though...just so i can catch up.

once again i am on my spiral staircase as i call it and there is no end to it. no endings...no beginnings...just endless up and down up and down and round and round.

a truly new beginning would mean you had amnesia and you simply forgot everything and had no ties to anything. that is never possible. nor would it be especially practical.

we think of time as this linear line...of walking forward...doing things...getting things done...going from point A to point B. not so my friend. i believe we are more like dogs chasing our tails going round and round...merging beginnings with endings so we don't know the difference anymore.

grief....loss....despair....all essential for change it seems. don't want to go through it....too bad. life drags you along anyway.

adaptability....resilience....survivor these folk...change.

there are folk who seemingly won't change. they are usually left on the curb. bye bye.

i am feeling agitated today...angsty...perhaps because i am on the precipice to change. i have no idea what the change will be but it is coming....i can feel it.

this is the process of my becoming....